A New York Split Second
Part 1
You big donut eating
Batman tight leather belt squeaking
Flyguys squeezing
My ID in your hand, pretending you're reading
Writing tickets? I call it blind refereeing
Tits and ass squeezing
The main one out there speeding
Talking sh*t for no reason
Obviously attention needing
The people of New York lined up with their complaints about the NYPD in sheer solidarity. Several million in fact, lodging more than 8 million complaints about the miscreant organisation that had terrorised the public to such an extent that a city-wide, class-action lawsuit had been filed against them for the ultra utopian sum of 8 quadrillion dollars.
When the mayor and other city legislators failed in their final attempts to block the motion from being heard, then there wasn't a jurists' panel that could be put together that didn't include people who'd signed testimonials of complaint against the defense, hence another delay.
A little pressure from the governor to derail it quickly and quietly, brought the state Superior Court reluctantly to gamble on inviting to hear the landmark legal complaint. It was just another of those New York publicity stunts to raise awareness, was what most people nation wide thought.
There was no way it could work.
The government would cheat in the end if they thought they were gonna lose anyway.
Isn't that how they always do?
Yes, if you accept the notion that they are some sort of external superior to you.
That notion is one of the founding mistakes of judgement that people make before they go out and commit acts that make every situation worse.
This story is about an individual and other groups of individuals who weren't ready to repeat that mistake in their thinking.
There aren't a lot of places in America that a former President of the United States can go without being called on it. That is, unless he's black, wearing business attire, carrying his briefcase and running in the middle of secret-service agents, on the sidewalk to an awaiting limousine parked curbside, in front of the Ramada.
Officer Palmolive recalled the events in his grand jury testimonials quite differently.
'I spotted a suspect in a private area, attempting to get away with stolen property.
I immediately neutralized the perp with a drop-kick, which was appropriate force, and then tagged to my partner, who was waiting to get some on that there goldchain.
My partner suplex slammed him and I was supposed to wait for the tag but that would've spoilt the whole shibang. I was already up on that pimps getaway car and full Jimmy Snooka smashing him just after he hit the concrete from the suplex. That sh*t was like babooooooommmm. All that action in four seconds, that's what we're trained to do.
Well when the other gentlemen pulled their guns we told them not to be alarmed, we got him. I handed one of the gentlemen back their property. They said that they were Secret-service, I told them 'too bad, we got him first.'
Of course he tried to give a fake name.'
Following his testimony, that officer and his partner were put back out there to protect the streets and were never again bothered by that or any other incidences, until now.
It was yet another highly publicised acquittal case which almost made it to the cold files, were it not for the unrelenting organised response of the public, and one lawyer's cunning.
Getting to be the president of America is no easy task, all the campaigning, shaking hands and endless praying, if you believe in such a thing these days. One thing for certain is that any such a person learns how to reach out to and rally the public for a cause. And it's not like when they retire from that most revered post, that all that experience and all those contacts are just lost. If anything, most who leave that office are better business people, negotiators, consultants and even legislators than when they swore that solemn oath. Add a shoulder chip, put there by a routine police assault and a justice system complacent with the suffering of negligible profilees, and the stage is set for greater change than any protest or vigilante efforts could achieve.
The embarrassing incident drew apologies for the misunderstanding, from the police chief, the mayor and the justice department. The usual suspects, the usual song, the usual shuffle of 'things we promise to better in the future' cards. The new president also was made to parrot the usual 'keep calm and let the police do their job' statements, just like he did when he was the chief commander. That irony didn't rest well and it was a totally different thing being made to understand this kind of suffering from ground zero.
Yes, We Can...Break Them.
Pay respect or pay up
Who wants to be a millionaire
Campaign slogans crossed his desk for 5 minutes before the perfect one jumped out of the pile of suggestion cards: 'No, put your hands up.' That was the one. He would go at it the best way he knew how, going on tv and radio talkshows, magazine and newspaper interviews renting billboard space, posters at bus stops, subway stations, signs. Handing out bumper stickers, buttons, tees. Websites, emails, mobile apps, he made sure to get the momentum rolling wherever possible and the public unanimously responded to: 'No, put your hands up! '
In an interview on The Stream, the plan and goal were laid out for the public. The 'No, put your hands up' campaign was a call to action for any New Yorker who had a complaint about the NYPD, to write, email, send photos, make a voice message or video, detailing their run ins, stop checks, pull overs or any other dealings with the law where people had been mistreated or abused in any way, shape or form. All those complaints would be compiled as testimonials and evidence to support a city-wide class-action lawsuit. And of course there would be a pay out in the end. That did it.
Materials and media came flooding in to the rented offices that made campaign HQ, he had to double the staff and double their salaries to handle it. Not to many's surprise, there must have been at least one or two complaints from every person in the entire city. They complained about everything from the tone of voice police used when addressing the public, to their habits of racial profiling. The cops were noted for stalking people, viewing everyone as suspects, player hating, being jealous of my ride, ogling my girlfriend, blasphemy, chauvinism, imperialist fascism, not liking hiphop, cutting into morning coffee lines, buying the last newspaper, being bad omens, arresting one husband before the wife could kill him for beating her. More complaints than ever imagined. A lot more serious ones including verbal/physical assaults, s*xual harassment, damaging property, wrongful arrests, causing mental trauma and financial damages were inventoried into the front lines.
Interestingly enough, half of the NYPD wrote in complaints about other cops some even complaining just about themselves: 'I am too overweight,' 'I have a sign on my head that says cop.' Everyone was in it to get a share of the multi quadrillion dollar lawsuit. Numerous women complained because cops had married them.
'No, put your hands up' took off without a hitch. Needless to say, pressure mounted on the justice department when the big joke looked like it might really result in something. The city's legal offices were hopping, they could see where this was going. Some calls went out to officials to try to talk the former commander and chief down and to try to find some sort of respectable compromise. He made his point, now it was time to put all this behind for the sake of the city's other police who were losing face with the public because of this publicity fiasco. Well, that was the word from up high atleast. In responding, the campaign headquarters released two lists of names for comparison, just to exemplify the magnitude of the situation. One list, the NYPD employees roster with the names of every officer, detective, captain, commander, jailer, forensics specialist, helicopter pilot, clerk, janitor, mechanic, horse, K9 and the Chief. The other list, NYPD employees whom complaints were made about. And both lists were one hundred percent identical. A note was sent along with the parcel containing this information. It simply read: We're getting requests to do prosecutors, public defence council and judges for our next one. The justice department promised to get back to them about this at a later date.
The class action motion was filed and went through every hard step to finally get before the bench.
When all had risen, the honourable so and so on, seats taken...here we go. The first thing the judge did was ask the plaintiff to approach. There, a quiet and lengthy discussion took place between the two men of law. When the ex-pres returned to his table, he plainly requested for a few days delay before making opening statements. The judge, now looking disturbingly surprised, asked almost insistently if he wouldn't like a much longer delay, then granted the request for 3 days.
Judge Joe and the former President were friends from law school. Joe had just warned him about this venture and the plans justice had: to bring counter charges against him for threatening national security if this lawsuit even looked like it would work. It would leave a city of millions without a police force, endanger lives and property, not to mention spur similar backlashes in other metropolitan cities to do the same. Joe didn't want to see his friend face that sort of grand jury firing squad, advising him to take some time and deflate this persecution of the NYPD. He only asked for 3 days.
That very evening, more determined than ever, the esteemed former leader of the freeworld along with all the help he could muster, were all spanning out to the public with a new message: 'Wanted, Volunteers to not commit any crimes. One Mil to Chill.'
Within the three days, several millions of respondents were self deputised, acknowledging oaths of personal societal protectorate status. In layman's terms, every individual promised to place themselves or others under citizens arrest for any infractions of the law. And yes! this meant that the payout per resident would make the several millions of them into millionaires. What else would they do?
Back in front of Joe, at the appointed time, the plaintiff side in the class-action motion brought argument after argument in swift, tactical strikes against the justice backed defence for the department. No lawyers they could find were even close to being up to the task when it came to rebuttals or finding something to object to in the plaintiff's statements of the facts. The Defence side did however manage to eek out; that in light of the just cause that the plaintiff was pursuing, the astronomical sum they were seeking, would endanger society. The entire force, millions of employees, would be out of work simultaneously; the entire department, all divisions, precincts, stations, would be liquidated; the city, its millions of people, would be left without safety, help or control.
The plaintiff curtly reached into his briefcase and produced a New York City Phonebook, showed it to all present in the courtroom and gently tossed it onto the defence council's table. To satisfy the court's ability to proceed with the case, the defense was invited to contact the new law enforcement organisation that would replace the police force: the already sworn-in people of New York.
Joe didn't hesitate to advise both sides to proceed.
The historic case was the most densely followed piece of news ever to hit the city, with residents representing the full spectrum of America's diversity, everyone was all of the sudden friendly, polite, courteous, helpful, very un-New Yorker-like. People just kept smiles on their faces throughput the day. Strangers formed flashmobs wherever and whenever. Workers and bosses quit their jobs together. The city was peaceful, no creatures were stirring, not even a mouse. A week went by before the defence side withdrew. The place and people's attitudes were all greatly improved. There was no bad news to report which cut the newscasts from one hour down to five minutes for weather. The current president congratulated his predecessor for that achievement. He had been from New York too, and never thought it tamable in a million years. However, for a million dollars?
A month went by. The city was withdrawing police, who happily turned in their tin, all in the departmental foreclosure process. Even the excops now walked on streets that were made much safer than their extinct profession ever could have. That payout was on the way and the country was watching with anticipation. Of course out of towners tried to shimmy in with a complaint and a promise to be good, too late though. New Yorkers were quick to escort them to the city boundaries, land or water. Nope, nothing was gonna come between them and their million dollars each.
The mayor introduced new city taxes that would come into effect the moment the funds were dispersed to the public. No complaints there, just as long as the cash was coming, the cops were a thing of the past and they had everything to look forward to if they just maintained self control and helped each other out a little. Besides, if the mayor was found to be misappropriating one cent, they all had the power to go over to city hall and place him under citizen's arrest.
When the first installment payments were offered up, one hundred thousand was sent or deposited to every New York resident born or otherwise there before the complaint cutoff date. The exhilaration that filled the city made it feel like a hundred New Years Eves.
That lawyer that went on to be president, only to become a lawyer again, didn't keep any of it for himself. In the latter years, other cities in America followed suit, cannibalising their police forces and making people ultimately responsible for themselves. He had a hand in a few of them, and American society prospered far greater than when he was president.
Posted By: Clint X
Monday, December 29th 2014 at 9:01PM
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