n a society that values bigger, better and faster, it can be difficult to overcome your insecurities and become a confident person. But because no one in the world focuses on you more than you do, beating your insecurities is as much of an internal struggle as it is a battle of self-improvement.
Despite being extremely difficult, admitting your weaknesses can pay dividends in the end. Once you admit to your lack of confidence in your s*xual or financial performance, for example, and overcome these insecurities, these aspects of your life will turn from monsters in your closet to facts that you’ve acknowledged and beaten.
Overcoming insecurities is no easy battle, as there are many factors that cause them, and they’re constantly reinforced by daily events. Thankfully, there is a step-by-step method for leaving your weaknesses in the background and leading a more confident existence. With that being said, read on to find out how to recognize and overcome your insecurities.
1- Find the root
Think about where you are lacking confidence: Do you think you fall flat in the boardroom? Are you the last to hit on a girl because you think you look bad? Do you get defensive about your girl’s bedroom jokes because you think she may be truly unsatisfied?
Consider where these thoughts come from. There may have been certain occurrences in your life that made you think less of yourself. For instance, if your first girlfriend told the whole school about your “small package,” you may have felt inadequate ever since. Once you’ve found the root of the problem, it’s much easier to get a handle on the insecurity, because it was most likely created by one or two isolated instances that have no real importance on your current life. Recognize where that insecurity started, and it’ll immediately seem more manageable.
2- Invalidate the problem
Once you’ve pinpointed the specific incident that created the crater in your self-image, consider why that occurrence doesn’t prove anything about your life as a whole, and think about the times in your life that prove the opposite. We are often too quick to forget the compliments or positive reinforcements that we’ve received from friends or colleagues, dismissing the kind words as pity or politeness.
Don’t focus on your lack of achievement when your cube mate scores a big account at work. Instead, remember when your boss complimented your own work or just how far you’ve come since you were a bottom-feeder at your company. Recognizing your successes will remind you of how great you are and how lucky your company is to have you. This will help you celebrate your coworkers' successes -- and remember that it can only be so long before your next big break.
3- Stop comparing yourself to others
It’s easy to become insecure when you constantly compare yourself to seemingly strong, flawless people. For example, if you compare yourself to the guy in the bar who seems so smooth with the ladies, you may come out feeling clumsy and awkward in your encounters with women. But, what you’re likely unaware of is that this guy has his own set of problems that he has to deal with. Instead of focusing on how you stack up against him, focus on what you can do and your skills with the ladies. If you’re a power negotiator at work, you know that you can talk circles around any girl. Now get out there and sell yourself.
Read more:
http://www.askmen.com/money/body_and_mind_...
Posted By: DAVID JOHNSON
Wednesday, April 11th 2012 at 7:57PM
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