Recently, my wife, Vicki and I had the opportunity to see Natalie Cole on “Larry King Live” where she was talking about her bout with kidney disease, her dialysis treatments and her need for a kidney transplant along with other topics. As we listened intently, we were amazed at the similarities of her testimony with mine: the three treatments per week, the tired, achy feelings following treatments, the routine of working and getting the treatments, etc. Most importantly, Ms. Cole talked about the need for organ donors and specifically, her need since she had more work to do. Those statements really got my attention! We love some Natalie Cole, but she isn’t the only person affected by this dreaded disease. She’s famous, so she has many outlets in which she can express her need. Since she did and received very positive responses, I felt the need to express myself.
Let me share with you my story. On June 6th, 2007, I started dialysis. My kidneys had failed to point in which this was my only option. My doctor told me very candidly, either I start dialysis or I die, period! After my first three treatments, I lost nearly 30 lbs! I was drained. I was sick all of the time. I couldn’t eat; when I did, I couldn’t keep anything down. My body ached all over. I had cramps all over my body! I cramped on the dialysis machine. I cramped at home. I cramped while I was asleep and I cramped when I was awake. I was drained physically, mentally and spiritually. I was too drained to do anything. I slept all of the time then when I was awake, it was time for another dialysis treatment. I remember thinking, “I have this to live for?” After a month or so of this, I felt like giving up. I just couldn’t handle it anymore. “If this was living”, I thought, “then I’d rather be dead than to live like this.”
One day, while I was lying in bed, my youngest daughter, Cori, came and laid beside me. Not too much longer, in came my oldest, Camryn. While laying there, they each began to tell me how much they loved me and how they wished that I wasn’t sick and how much they missed me. You see, before I got sick, I always had made time to spend with my girls. We laughed and played together. I read to them and was an active part of their lives. Now, I was just there. Sick! Then there was my wife, Vicki. My best friend. The person who had stuck beside me through all of this. Because I had gotten so sick, she had to not only be moma, but in so many ways, she had to be daddy too! She was doing it all! Winning the bread, bringing home the bacon, going to soccer games, running the errands, taking me back andforth to all of the appointments, doing the teacher conferences. You name it, Vicki now owned it. And to add the situation, we were about to lose everything! Since I had gotten sick, I wasn’t working; therefore, no income on my part was coming in. Disability, even though I was instantly qualified because of the dialysis, was months away. It seemed like nearly everyone in our circle had turned their backs on us. (That’s another story-let’s say I can relate to that song, “Nobody Wants You When You’re Down and Out!”) Realizing that I was still a husband, a father, a son, a brother, a minister, a friend, a hard working employee, a bread winner-I decided that I wanted to live!
Making a long story longer, I adjusted to the dialysis. I read everything I could get my hands on regarding dialysis and diets. Once I adjusted to the dialysis, I went back to work. My company required me to relocate to the Nashville area. It was literally, “just in the nick of time” because; we did eventually lose everything-the house, the cars, everything. (That too is another story!) We had o pick up the pieces and start over.
In terms of health, the move was the right thing to do. It turns out that I have found one of the leading kidney doctors in the country, here in Nashville. I have gained strength over the last couple of years. I’ve been listed on the National Registry for Organ Donation. I still do dialysis three days a week, Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday at 5:00 am. I’m up at 3:30 am getting prepared go for my four hour treatments. On Tuesday and Thursday mornings, my family sacrifices and takes me to the center. We try to leave home no later than 4:30 am. Once I’m finished (around 9:30-10:00 am) I head off to work. I look forward to Saturday’s treatment for two reasons-one, my family gets to sleep in and two, I get to come home afterwards and sleep myself. My family usually leaves for a few hours so that I can catch up on some much needed rest.
When I got on the National Registry in August, I was extremely excited. I knew that it was only a matter of time before I would have a kidney donated. However, as I continued with my research, I have come to realize that the average wait time for a donor for an African-American male is seven years. Why? Because there is a nation-wide shortage of organ donors. As of April 19, 2009, there were 101,693 people waiting for an organ to be donated. Of that number 79,342 are waiting on a kidney to be donated. So far this year, there have been 1,170 total organ donors. It is stated that an average of 18 people per day die in the U. S. awaiting an organ donation. When you look at the African-American community, the numbers are overwhelming since we as a community are less likely to be organ donors. Education and awareness are the barriers to overcoming this deficit. One person who becomes an organ donor can have an immediate impact on eight lives! We need to address the needs of our community. Our communities need organ donors. Becoming an organ donor provides the gift of life for so many. It is the right thing to do! Make the decision to become a donor and tell your family what your wishes are. The life you save could very well be mine!
I want to live because I have work to do! For the rest of my life, I will sound the alarm regarding organ donation. I will speak regarding health issues, especially to African-American men. I want to live to that I can see my children grow. I want to grow old with my wife. I want to see my grandchildren, when the time comes. Help me spread the word!
Posted By: Tim Magsby
Monday, April 20th 2009 at 12:19PM
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