Oftentimes, we have dreams and plans of a particular course of action. Then something happens and you hear the voice of God redirecting you.
The following story has been in the news and understanding how society sensationalizes tragedies, I can never grow weary from my calling and purpose. As I study to learn the advocacy climate, state laws, regulations, etc. in my new hometown of N. Charleston, SC, it is becoming clear to me to not only keep raising awareness about mental illnesses, but to also continue working with children. Bye and bye, I am understanding why God sent me to this new land.
If we teach our children about mental wellness and practice mental wellness, they grow up to be adults who know about mental wellness and practice mental wellness in most cases. They become responsible for their mental wellness.
Understand that African-Americans are the least race group in America who will seek and obtain mental healthcare. The deeper meaning is that African-Americans deny mental illnesses exist and they do not get mental healthcare. The reasons are: illiteracy, shame, pride, poverty, lack of trust in healthcare professionals, etc. Of all the race groups in America who seek and obtain mental healthcare, African-Americans are at the bottom.
As a culture, African-Americans live with depression and depression hurts. In a spiritual context, depression in internalized anger. Something is not going on right in your life and you become angry. This is normal, but understand that we are designed by God to have joy, peace, happiness, love. When we become angry, we can work through it under normal conditions.
The balance God designed is that there are life experiences that cause happiness. Primarily, a strong personal relationship with God will keep us balanced in mind,body, and spirit.
In Luke 21:33 NIV, Jesus teaches us that "Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away." Through this, we know that the we are to be encouraged and comforted by the teachings of Jesus Christ. Filling up on the words of Jesus Christ, allows us to cope and manage those feelings of anger. These words teach us how to live and take care of our mind, body, and spirit. The very next scripture at Luke 21:34 NIV, warns us to be careful or our hearts will be weighed down with dissipation, drunkeness, and the anxieties of life ...." In being careful, we must, must sacrifice our pride and get proper mental healthcare knowledge and services when needed before "...and that day will close on you unexpectedly like a trap!" (Luke 21:34 NIV). The trap is the situation taking over and you cannot control it. The trap does not have to be suicide or homicide, it could be an eviction, a broken relationship, a car repossession, a lost job, inability to concentrate, drug/alcohol use, sickness, or any number of negative outcomes.
Understand that each time you become angry, your brain is releasing chemicals. These chemicals cause the emotion (feeling) of sadness, hurt, pain, etc. When your brain chemicals are imbalanced, your brain is producing too many chemicals causing these negative feelings (or happy feelings) that take you into depression and if the depression lasts daily for two weeks or more and you do not get mental health intervention, then despair. You NEED medication and counseling to balance those chemicals and work through the issues causing you to be angry. African-Americans have become used to living with pain and this is passed on to our children. Thus, mental illness in the black community has become generational. We have to break that generational curse by educating ourselves, seeking mental healthcare, get counseling when we need it, and trust mental health professionals.
Understand that when a mental health condition is ignored, the person will not be able to control his or her behavior when it becomes extreme. The classic symptoms of depression include inability to concentrate and lack of energy. Keep this in mind as you read the article below. Inability to concentrate could lead to failing grades and lack of energy could lead to inability to properly care for young children. These symptoms were clues of a mental health problem being untreated. Thus, we end up with sensational tragedies. When the news fades away, so does our interest ... until it happens again or hits home, etc.
Now what typically happens when people do not know the symptoms, is that we criticize and judge a person. "Stop being lazy and give those kids a bath. You are a bad mother!" (hypothetical). These critical remarks cut deep into a person who is already struggling with a mental illness. The natural response in this circumstance, is defensiveness, increased anger, hurt feelings, etc. If this is ongoing, the situation for the person with the mental illness is getting worse and worse. Then somebody lays you out and takes your children from you and gives them a bath humiliating you all the while and the mentally ill person snaps. (hypothetical). The source of your criticism is the children. The source of the dissipations are the children. (children need clothes, food, shelter and mom cannot provide it, etc.). (hypothetical).
Now consider this, as the mental health condition gets worse, so does the ability to make good, sound decisions. Nobody is helping the mother. Everybody is judging, criticizing, not providing needed services. This is what typical families will do out of habit ... verbally attack, gossip, insult, humiliate, embarrass, etc., Then the only thing the mentally ill person can do under extreme stress/pressure is to remove the source of the problem as he or she sees it: the children. (hypothetical).
Ok, I was not planning this, but God is in control. When I experienced a nervous breakdown in 1993, it was due to severe depression. However, I was not educated about depression so I ignored all the symptoms until my mind crashed. If you have not read my book, it discussed in detail the state of my anger at the time I had a nervous breakdown. Anger. At no time leading up to my nervous breakdown, did any friend or family member know the symptoms as well. In our society, we say, "She crazy." and keep it moving. We say, "Girl, get it together." and keep it moving. We say, "Get over it." and keep it moving. We say, "I ain''t crazy!" and keep it moving. We say, "I'm fine." (when we are hurting) and keep it moving. We say, "She lazy and don't take care of her children right." and keep it moving. We say, "You ain't a good mother." and keep it moving.
Being judgmental and critical does not help a person experiencing depression. It should not make you feel better either. I don't know anything about the facts of this news story, but if you were educated about depression, you can intervene and prevent suicides and homicides before they happen. The reason there is information about intervention and prevention, is because experts who came before us studied the "what happened?" from previous events. By the will of God, the information they share is for our benefit and good to keep advancing the Kingdom.
If we choose to not read, understand, listen, act, etc., we are holding back the Kingdom one by one.
I give all honor and praise that I have never wanted to hurt myself or others. I seek a greater understanding like other men and women of God when this sort of tragedy happens. I cry, too.
God has given society the wisdom to avoid tragedies. Not all tragedies can be avoided. However, we are accountable as a society for the tragedies that we can avoid. People like you and me make up society.
As soon as I heard about this on the news, it was clear that this woman had a mental health condition that was untreated. It was clear the people intimately involved with her lacked the knowledge and understanding which is typical. It was clear that this tragedy could have been prevented. And then I just pray. The reporter who wrote this article, has said it best and I urge you to read the entire article. Then do a spiritual gut check.
NOTE: Manic is the extreme phase of feeling good or bad. A manic depressive phase is feeling extremely intense sadness that hurts the mind, body, spirit. It is the phase of hopelessness (believing there is no way out of a situation no matter what). Ultimately, hopelessness is extreme despair or despondency. Hopelessness causes suicide/homicide. Understand the person in this phase cannot find, hear, or see God or make a sound, rational decision.*
Depression Symptoms: Low Self-Esteem, increased irritability or agitation, changes in eating/sleeping, cannot make decisions, lack of concentration, guilt feelings, frequent complaints of physical pain, low energy, lack of enthusiasm/motivation, drug/alcohol abuse, thoughts of death or suicide, persistent feelings of sadness, hopelessness.*
Suicide Prevention: A person having thoughts of suicide/homicide will leave clues before they act. It could be a note, things they say, a written-out plan, suddenly hoarding pills, isolating him or herself, purchasing a weapon, drawing pictures of death, visiting and/or reading suicide/homicide assisted material/websites.*
* See the National Alliance on Mental Illness at
www.nami.org; Suicide Prevention Resource Center at
www.sprc.org; the American Association of Pastoral Counselors at
www.aapc.org; and First Call For Help at 1 800 492-0618.
Anointed men and women of God gifted with spiritual discernment must intercede with spiritual warfare along with intercessory prayers. (Nehemiah 7:1 NIV). A person in this phase of mental illness who is untreated has no divine spiritual insight causing no impartation until the spirit is broken.
Please pray for this mother, family, community for the journey ahead for a healing that glorifies God.
**************************
Oftentimes, we have dreams and plans of a particular course of action. Then something happens and you hear the voice of God redirecting you.
The following story has been in the news and understanding how society sensationalizes tragedies, I can never grow weary from my calling and purpose. As I study to learn the advocacy climate, state laws, regulations, etc. in my new hometown of N. Charleston, SC, it is becoming clear to me to not only keep raising awareness about mental illnesses, but to also continue working with children. Bye and bye, I am understanding why God sent me to this new land.
If we teach our children about mental wellness and practice mental wellness, they grow up to be adults who know about mental wellness and practice mental wellness in most cases. They become responsible for their mental wellness.
Understand that African-Americans are the least race group in America who will seek and obtain mental healthcare. The deeper meaning is that African-Americans deny mental illnesses exist and they do not get mental healthcare. The reasons are: illiteracy, shame, pride, poverty, lack of trust in healthcare professionals, etc. Of all the race groups in America who seek and obtain mental healthcare, African-Americans are at the bottom.
As a culture, African-Americans live with depression and depression hurts. In a spiritual context, depression in internalized anger. Something is not going on right in your life and you become angry. This is normal, but understand that we are designed by God to have joy, peace, happiness, love. When we become angry, we can work through it under normal conditions.
The balance God designed is that there are life experiences that cause happiness. Primarily, a strong personal relationship with God will keep us balanced in mind,body, and spirit.
In Luke 21:33 NIV, Jesus teaches us that "Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away." Through this, we know that the we are to be encouraged and comforted by the teachings of Jesus Christ. Filling up on the words of Jesus Christ, allows us to cope and manage those feelings of anger. These words teach us how to live and take care of our mind, body, and spirit. The very next scripture at Luke 21:34 NIV, warns us to be careful or our hearts will be weighed down with dissipation, drunkeness, and the anxieties of life ...." In being careful, we must, must sacrifice our pride and get proper mental healthcare knowledge and services when needed before "...and that day will close on you unexpectedly like a trap!" (Luke 21:34 NIV). The trap is the situation taking over and you cannot control it. The trap does not have to be suicide or homicide, it could be an eviction, a broken relationship, a car repossession, a lost job, inability to concentrate, drug/alcohol use, sickness, or any number of negative outcomes.
Understand that each time you become angry, your brain is releasing chemicals. These chemicals cause the emotion (feeling) of sadness, hurt, pain, etc. When your brain chemicals are imbalanced, your brain is producing too many chemicals causing these negative feelings (or happy feelings) that take you into depression and if the depression lasts daily for two weeks or more and you do not get mental health intervention, then despair. You NEED medication and counseling to balance those chemicals and work through the issues causing you to be angry. African-Americans have become used to living with pain and this is passed on to our children. Thus, mental illness in the black community has become generational. We have to break that generational curse by educating ourselves, seeking mental healthcare, get counseling when we need it, and trust mental health professionals.
Understand that when a mental health condition is ignored, the person will not be able to control his or her behavior when it becomes extreme. The classic symptoms of depression include inability to concentrate and lack of energy. Keep this in mind as you read the article below. Inability to concentrate could lead to failing grades and lack of energy could lead to inability to properly care for young children. These symptoms were clues of a mental health problem being untreated. Thus, we end up with sensational tragedies. When the news fades away, so does our interest ... until it happens again or hits home, etc.
Now what typically happens when people do not know the symptoms, is that we criticize and judge a person. "Stop being lazy and give those kids a bath. You are a bad mother!" (hypothetical). These critical remarks cut deep into a person who is already struggling with a mental illness. The natural response in this circumstance, is defensiveness, increased anger, hurt feelings, etc. If this is ongoing, the situation for the person with the mental illness is getting worse and worse. Then somebody lays you out and takes your children from you and gives them a bath humiliating you all the while and the mentally ill person snaps. (hypothetical). The source of your criticism is the children. The source of the dissipations are the children. (children need clothes, food, shelter and mom cannot provide it, etc.). (hypothetical).
Now consider this, as the mental health condition gets worse, so does the ability to make good, sound decisions. Nobody is helping the mother. Everybody is judging, criticizing, not providing needed services. This is what typical families will do out of habit ... verbally attack, gossip, insult, humiliate, embarrass, etc., Then the only thing the mentally ill person can do under extreme stress/pressure is to remove the source of the problem as he or she sees it: the children. (hypothetical).
Ok, I was not planning this, but God is in control. When I experienced a nervous breakdown in 1993, it was due to severe depression. However, I was not educated about depression so I ignored all the symptoms until my mind crashed. If you have not read my book, it discussed in detail the state of my anger at the time I had a nervous breakdown. Anger. At no time leading up to my nervous breakdown, did any friend or family member know the symptoms as well. In our society, we say, "She crazy." and keep it moving. We say, "Girl, get it together." and keep it moving. We say, "Get over it." and keep it moving. We say, "I ain''t crazy!" and keep it moving. We say, "I'm fine." (when we are hurting) and keep it moving. We say, "She lazy and don't take care of her children right." and keep it moving. We say, "You ain't a good mother." and keep it moving.
Being judgmental and critical does not help a person experiencing depression. It should not make you feel better either. I don't know anything about the facts of this news story, but if you were educated about depression, you can intervene and prevent suicides and homicides before they happen. The reason there is information about intervention and prevention, is because experts who came before us studied the "what happened?" from previous events. By the will of God, the information they share is for our benefit and good to keep advancing the Kingdom.
If we choose to not read, understand, listen, act, etc., we are holding back the Kingdom one by one.
I give all honor and praise that I have never wanted to hurt myself or others. I seek a greater understanding like other men and women of God when this sort of tragedy happens. I cry, too.
God has given society the wisdom to avoid tragedies. Not all tragedies can be avoided. However, we are accountable as a society for the tragedies that we can avoid. People like you and me make up society.
As soon as I heard about this on the news, it was clear that this woman had a mental health condition that was untreated. It was clear the people intimately involved with her lacked the knowledge and understanding which is typical. It was clear that this tragedy could have been prevented. And then I just pray. The reporter who wrote this article, has said it best and I urge you to read the entire article. Then do a spiritual gut check.
NOTE: Manic is the extreme phase of feeling good or bad. A manic depressive phase is feeling extremely intense sadness that hurts the mind, body, spirit. It is the phase of hopelessness (believing there is no way out of a situation no matter what). Ultimately, hopelessness is extreme despair or despondency. Hopelessness causes suicide/homicide. Understand the person in this phase cannot find, hear, or see God or make a sound, rational decision.*
Depression Symptoms: Low Self-Esteem, increased irritability or agitation, changes in eating/sleeping, cannot make decisions, lack of concentration, guilt feelings, frequent complaints of physical pain, low energy, lack of enthusiasm/motivation, drug/alcohol abuse, thoughts of death or suicide, persistent feelings of sadness, hopelessness.*
Suicide Prevention: A person having thoughts of suicide/homicide will leave clues before they act. It could be a note, things they say, a written-out plan, suddenly hoarding pills, isolating him or herself, purchasing a weapon, drawing pictures of death, visiting and/or reading suicide/homicide assisted material/websites.*
* See the National Alliance on Mental Illness at
www.nami.org; Suicide Prevention Resource Center at
www.sprc.org; the American Association of Pastoral Counselors at
www.aapc.org; and First Call For Help at 1 800 492-0618.
Anointed men and women of God gifted with spiritual discernment must intercede with spiritual warfare along with intercessory prayers. (Nehemiah 7:1 NIV). A person in this phase of mental illness who is untreated has no divine spiritual insight causing no impartation until the spirit is broken.
Please pray for this mother, family, community for the journey ahead for a healing that glorifies God.
Apostle Agnes B. Levine
Founder/President, Levine-Oliver Publisher
Co-Founder Cooling Well Water Ministries
www.levineoliverpublisher.com, 2010 Strathmore's Distinguished Who's Who!
Author of: "Cooling Well Water: A Collection of Work By An
African-American Bipolar Woman" ISBN 13 978-0-9754612-0-4
Available NOW at Amazon.com while supplies last!
Psalm Music soothes the mood
in my private room
for thoughts gathered throughout the day
my 'lone time to pray
Ps. 100
**************************
Shaquan Duley Was 'Manic' Before Killing Her Two Children, Family Says
By Jeff Mays on Sep 17th 2010 1:56PM
Filed under: News
Comments (13)
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The South Carolina mother who smothered and then drowned her two sons was in a manic state and angry after arguing with her family about the care of her children.
Shaquan Duley's family, appearing on 'The Oprah Winfrey Show' on Thursday, said the argument began because Duley was angry that family members had bathed her two children. Soon she sped off with the kids.
"She was highly upset, raging, acting like a crazy person, nothing like I've ever seen her before," Helen Duley said of her daughter. "She was depressed about not having a means to take care of the children."
After Duley stormed off, the family contacted police, who spoke to her and told her to return home. Instead, police say the mother confessed to smothering her two children (Devean Duley, 2, and 18-month-old Ja'van Duley) in a hotel room and then allegedly strapped the two boys in her car and drove them into the river.
"She got the children, and she had one under each arm, and she carried them out of the house," said Duley's sister Adriane Duley. "That was the last that I saw her."
Duley's lawyer said his client, who has yet to enter a plea on two counts of murder, is eligible for the death penalty; however, Carl B. Grant said he may pursue an insanity plea for his client, who was deeply depressed before the alleged murders.
Duley was unemployed and relying on her family for financial support. She was failing online classes and upset because she had not had contact with her children's father. Grant said she tried to commit suicide the night of the boys' deaths by taking dozens of headache medicines and trying to slit her wrists. She allegedly considered drowning herself in the car with her kids.
This was a woman who had truly reached rock bottom. Unfortunately, no one was able to reach her before she made her horrible decision.
What Duley is accused of doing is horrendous. There obviously had to be some psychological issues involved in her decision to kill her children.
However, anyone feeling at the end of his or her rope, as this mother obviously was, should reach hope that he or she will be able to reach out to someone for help. With people still losing their homes and jobs on a daily basis, there are people all around us who are susceptible to falling in to deep despair. Getting the message out that it is okay to reach out for help is the only positive thing that can come out of this terrible tragedy.
Even though everyone is angry at Duley and disgusted by her terrible actions, we must accept that it is our responsibility as a society and a community to reach out to people who might be in trouble, even if they try to pretend otherwise or do not ask for help.
Duley's family, who lost their beloved nephews and grandsons, say they have forgiven Duley because of their faith in God.
"I wish the best for my daughter," Helen Duley said. "Whatever she's dealing with inside, that's between her and God, but I wish the best for my daughter."
If Shaquan Duley's family can forgive her, then so should we.
Passing the peace, love, hugs
(my opinion is purely speculative and not factual)
Posted By: agnes levine
Thursday, September 23rd 2010 at 9:56AM
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