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Obesity is a problem that is effecting America as a whole. But it seems That "Black" women are at the head of the pack. Why is physical health being put on the back burner? You say you love yourselves, but you don't want to take care of yourselves. You're successful and want a man, but what man wants an obese woman? You want society to respect you. When will you start respecting yourselves?
Posted By: Kevin Cook
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 12:25PM
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Well..lmao. wow.
Um..
I cant speak for all woman, but I can speak for myself. My umm.. obesity? I guess. Came when I started middle-school. I had alot of things going on at home, my mother was on a fixed income and she didn't have the money nor time to be going out buy anything "special" as she would say. I was involved in SOME sports but that didnt stick.. not at all. Basketball would make me tired, and tennis would piss me off because I would keep having to go get the ball :/ I do believe that life has been harder for me because I am overweight but I havent let it stop me.. I have recently started working out more. .and choosing my food selections more wisely. No matter what anyone says/thinks/ or feels.. I will continue to be loud mouthed witty me.. while your calling me FAT.. lol. I feel if that is the only thing ignorant-ill minded immature people can say about me? So be it. I wear what I wanna wear, and feel it great in it at the SAMETIME! I am NOT saying I dont wish I would hurry and be a size.. 7, 8 or 9 like NOW! because.. thats DEFINITLEY not the truth.. but I accept my work in progress and could careless if no one else does.
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 12:32PM
Chamieka House
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I think this is a valid point. Not from an aesthetic point of view, but that of health.
We've always valued women of size in the African American community, much more so than other cultures. However, we need to look at our health... we're talking about our mothers, wives, and daughters. We need you here with us.
Brothas, same thing... we know we put off going to the doctor until something's seriously wrong. Let's take some steps to get active and eat healthier.
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 12:32PM
Jon C.
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That's exactly it Jonathan. Health. You cannot say you are healthy if you are obese.
Chemieka, after reading your post, it seems the only reason you didn't stick with sports is because you had to "work" or it made you "tired". What did you expect it would do? Magically transform you? If you want to stay healthy you have to work at it and persevere. If you won't even work to keep your own body healthy, what WILL you work at?
I'm not out here to judge big women. Or to judge anyone for that matter. This is just how I feel.
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 12:51PM
Kevin Cook
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Wow. I am so glad you went there. And I'm not comparing us to any other race. I'm just going to say that we if put as much attention on our bodies and what goes in them as we do on our nails and hair and clothes, perhaps we would not only be healthier, but we'd have a lot more happiness, too.
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 12:51PM
Karen Hunter
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No,
I completely understand what your saying.. all of thee above is true. I DIDNT want to work at it. .and at the point in time.. I WASNT over-weight and I didnt feel the need to work at anything but opening a bag of chips when I got home. Like I said, I HAVE ALOT of reasons that contributed to my health, and size. Although I have not had any major health problems concerning my weight Im sure that if I stayed on that track.. I would have. I dont know.. I mean.. food seemed to be more resolution to everything. Eat out all the time... We would be moving very often my mother has been dealing with substance abuse since before myself and siblings were born so we never really had any stable home enviroment...DONT GET ME WRONG.. My mother loves us to death, but drugs have had a stong hold on her since ..forever? I mean, its made life for us really hard and Ive had issues in other areas not even dealing with my weight. I feel right now I am in the prime of my youth, and I have the oppertunity to just start OVER completetly.. like I said, I am OK with being a work in progress, I know what I am doing to benefit myself & health even if no one else see`s it. I dont have a defeated attitude towards anything that comes my way, and my weight wont be any differently. I go out, mix & mingle just like the next person.. I aint gonna let this hold me back what so ever.. actually, I stopped seeing it as an issues WITHIN MYSELF! I still get comments, or..you know people saying rude things.. but if I let that be that be the begining of a problem I will get NOWHERE. This goes for any issue, if SOMEONE cant accept you for who you ARE weight then hey, thats fine.I`ve dated guys that I didnt even think would LOOK MY WAY let alone.. you know, other things.. but it is because and only BECAUSE either.. I was what they wanted physically? Or..They looked deeper inside of me for who I really am. I dont take myself as an unattractive person at all yo, because I am truly not. Just packin` a few extra pounds!
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 1:00PM
Chamieka House
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I am very puzzled as to why I was the inspiration to this blog though, but hey, this is an on-going problem.. and Im ok with being the example :)
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 1:10PM
Chamieka House
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Tamiko, you're right. It is hard for some people to get thier hands on healthy foods. It is not hard, though, to set aside 20-30 mins. every other day for excercise no matter where you're at.
Society is not responsible for lack of discipline. Lack of discipline is incorporated into society by the individuals. The individuals change. Society changes.
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 1:15PM
Kevin Cook
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It`s easy for you to come to such a conclusion being that you are not in the position yourself. It`s one of those " YOU DONT KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE"..well, you really dont. The point is, most people dont let differences hold them back. Especially when it can be changed. Im 18. Big, and smart as all hell. Im lovin` life boo.. big & all :)
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 1:18PM
Chamieka House
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Chamieka, you were not the inspiration for this blog. You just happened to comment on it. Again, not passing judgement, but it seems as though your insecurities are causing you to automatically count yourself as the victim(Sound familiar "Black" America?). You said you've been in relationships with people whom you thought would never notice you. Why do you think a certain kind of man will not be interested in you, despite how "confident" you are?
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 1:19PM
Kevin Cook
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I definitely DONT think count myself as the "victim" It`s too many people in this same position.. to count myself as the victim. That doesnt make sense. I AM confident within MYSELF.. I cant help other people`s mindsets Kevim, people have preferences and a list of kinds of people they just WOULDNT DATE... It`s 2008.. BIG GIRLS have never really been IN and for a highly attractive guy to come my way, confident in what he`s doing..would be rare..come on now. That`s why I felt the need to point it out. Media maybe plays a big role in this as well. I personally, would NEVER date another big person.. for example.
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 1:23PM
Chamieka House
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You don't count yourself as a victim, and yet you Assumed you were the inspiration for this blog? Your first two blogs were testimonies on how you were the victim of a broken home and ignorant remarks. And now you're trying to tell me that, because other people are also victims, you can't be one?
Yes, people do have preferences. And a confident person would consider themselves to be included in those preferences.
The media's job is to keep viewers watching by reporting interesting news topics. That is all. They are not here to "represent" any particular group in what ever way. When people stop watching, that is when they will change.
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 1:33PM
Kevin Cook
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Uuugggh, your pissing me off! lol .. but at the sometime I cant say I don't understand where your coming from! Your saying things that people WANT to say to me, and they would get they same response. I'm not counting myself out, Im saying I dont wouldn't usually expect to be counted in. Like I said before, and before that.. I DO NOT consider myself a victim. Anyone that is in my position would get the same amount of redicule, or maybe even more? Im refuse to walk around defeated.. for the last time.. So I go out there and get mines.. or atleast attempt too? All those things good & bad happened to me when I was younger but instead of letting that be the beginning of my end.. I am currently using it as a crutch to better myself. It is CLEAR I am not your kind of woman, lol..wow
Great topic!
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 1:38PM
Chamieka House
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Chemieka, don't get me wrong. I understand where you are coming from also. But I also strongly believe what I say to be true. You do not walk around defeated and that's good. You are not defeated. But your midset is a common one amongst Black women. Not your particular mindset, but the general.
I simply believe taht it is important for people to know that you lose when you give up. We mustn't give up on keeping our bodies in(atleast) a decent condition. That is where I see the problem. Some black women who are obese feel that thier condition is OK in some way.
It's not right to "ridicule" anyone, whoever they may be. But Let's not sit back and act like something is OK when it is not.
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 1:49PM
Kevin Cook
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I couldn't agree with her anymore.
Say what you want, understandably..
but..I will still wake up myself every morning..
and still being OK with it..
Now..
I`m going to eat lunch :)
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 2:01PM
Chamieka House
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Lisa, I never said I was the spokesperson for black men. I merely asked a question and you immediately took offense. The statistic I stated is correct.
You mentioned Monique. Did she not make a movie about how angry she felt at her own obesity entitled "Phat Girls" ? How can she claim to be confident when her whole gimmick is based on putting "skinny" women down? That is not the sign of a confident woman.
You say I'm ignorant? You ask what I would do if my child suffered from irreversable obesity? Such a thing does not exist, so there's no need to deal with it. If you excercise and eat right, you will be healthy for the most part.
You claim that I'm shallow and only look at what's on the outside. How you take care of what is on the outside reflects how you feel on the inside. You said when you were on steriods you blew up and was miserable. I rest my case.
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 2:04PM
Kevin Cook
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By the way, I've already addressed that this is not simply a "black" problem. No problem in society is.
You said you teach "your kids" to have have the midset of Kevin Cook. How can you do that when you clearly don't know what my mindset is. Attacking my character does not justify your argument, and since you felt the need to attack my character I can only conclude that you are not at peace with your own character. Though you claim to be confident.
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 2:16PM
Kevin Cook
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correction: *NOT to have the mindset...
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 2:17PM
Kevin Cook
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Without making excuses for those who have become comfortable with being unhealthy (whether it shows up in body fat or not), I will say there is a strong socio-economic link to obesity. Before we moved on up to the east side, we lived in a high density suburb of mostly low to middle-class working black folk. Well, you would've thought we were in another country judging by the supermarket. The veggie section was AWFUL. I'm originally from a small midwestern town where everybody had a garden and fresh, organic food was the norm. So I wasn't used to gnats flying everywhere, rotting potatoes, filth etc. and to top it off EXTREMELY high prices for fresh produce!!! It was a shock. This is where we had to shop too, the other markets in the area were just as terrible. People with no cars were even worse off than us.
I had to resort to eating dried and processed foods more, and eating more frozen vegetables (selection still was poor and prices high). I ended up eating what could fill me up.I must have gained nearly 10 pounds in the couple of years we were there. I was able to research and find a farm nearby where I could go work for fresh food, so that's what I did. But I had a car; the place wasnt metro accesible.
Another issue was exercise. I lived in a fairly dangerous (first suburb) area- the apartments were surrounded by parking lots and not set up for people who want to take a walk. It was depressing. Again, this was a mostly middle class area. Lots and lots of teachers, plumbers, administative workers, pastors, small business owners lived in this area. But there were no nice gyms and you couldn't walk outside w/o fear of being hit or mugged. On the other side of town, there are nice parks and lots of trails everywhere.
BIG difference.
I was afraid to leave my house to go walk alone b/ once a lady was found in the trunk of her car 10 miles away from her place. She lived in our apartments. There were other incidents too.
A link has been shown between poverty and obesity. We know that blacks are much more likely to experience poverty. Sress also releases hormones that resist weight loss.
I think the issue is not as simple as, Eat less and exercise. There are clearly socio-economic, environment and other issues at play as well as cultural. I've thought a lot about this because of my experience. It was a real eye-opener for me. Now we are in a more comfortable neighborhood. I go for walks; I can shop at a nice grocery store where the food quality is acceptable. I can get organic produce. Its clean. I'm not afraid to be out alone. And I'm still in a mostly black area, just a slightly higher socio-economic level.
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 4:37PM
Rana Dotson
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Don't worry I hear you guys. However, None of these reasons justify a 60% obesity rate. The conditions outside have no bearing on an indoor excercise routine. A person who is hardly mobile would, obviously, have difficulties excercising. But there are few in that situation in relation to the general population and not all of them are obese.
Alesha, you asked if I care about the health or the aesthetics. I care about both because they go hand in hand.You say God did not make us all to be the same size. That is true, but I am confident he did not make any of us to be obese. If you can find a man who has a preference for obese women, then that is fine. But there is a clear overwhelming majority that do not share that view. If you take good care of yourself, then that will be evident by your body image.
I am not trying to address the people who are incapable of sustaining good eating habits and/or excercise. I am speaking on the people who want to try and make people think it is OK to be obese. There are many people in the situations you all have mentioned, and I'm sure they wished they were in a more comfortable situation so they could take better care of themselves in ALL ways as Rana made clear in the above post.
I am not trying to say that all "skinny" people are healthy because that is clearly not the case. But we don't have an astonishing amount of underweight "Black" women do we? Pointing out the flaws of others does not justify obesity. I never said that obese women do have respect. But you can not demand respect when you clearly don't respect your own body.
SES, stress, and depression cause people to neglect thier bodies, but they do not cause fat to start building up. In fact, most people who are stressed or depressed tend to LOSE weight.
Again, I am not here to put anyone down. I am here to dispute the uplifting of obesity.
Tuesday, July 29th 2008 at 11:29PM
Kevin Cook
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Yes, Alesha I am equating obesity with lack of self respect. Hopefully you've realized by now that I am very serious. I believe that respect would be hard to come by, when your outward appearance suggests otherwise. Anyone who has been on a successful job interview would tell you this.
Yes, the body tends to hold on to fatty cells when you don't eat regulary enough, but when a person recovers from that and begins to live a healthy lifestyle they will not become obese. People respond to streesors in different ways. Though that is a contributor to some cases of obesity, it is not a factor that cannot be counteracted.
The fact that people have different body make-ups doesn't mean some people are destined to be obese. You can stop pushing the idea that I'm trying to support an "ideal" weight also because I am not.
I understand what a body image is, and I also know that obesity almost always coincides with a poor body image. You ask me what I say to people who don't give up on excercise, but still fail to lose the appropriate amount of weight. Obviously thier workout routine is not working for them, so they need to try a different more effective one.
Trying to teach people to be comfortable and confident is fine. How can you be either when you know you've made a choice to live a poor lifestyle? People become confident when they know what thier doing is right. You may start to feel ok with being obese just as one may feel ok with smoking a cigarette. You won't change if you see no reason why you should.
I only slice it one way, Alesha. I believe that your what counts, or what you believe counts, is reflectant in all aspects of your being. Being busy is not an excuse to neglect your body. If you neglect it, then you won't be effective enough or around much longer to be busy with anything. If you've ever listened to Suze Orman she will tell you the same thing, only from an economic standpoint.
Wednesday, July 30th 2008 at 6:18PM
Kevin Cook
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