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GOP LAUNCHES TIME TRAVEL MACHINE TO PROMOTE FUTURE DISAGREEMENTS WITH OBAMA. By Andy Borowitz, Feb. 24, 2010

Richard Kigel · Wednesday, February 24th 2010 at 11:24AM · 313 views
“MY COLLEAGUES AND I HAVE TRAVELED TWO DAYS INTO THE FUTURE AND LISTENED TO EVERYTHING THE PRESIDENT WILL SAY,” REP. JOHN BOEHNER TOLD REPORTERS AT THE CAPITAL. “AND IT WILL ALL SUCK.”

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) - In a plot twist worthy of the television series Lost, key congressional Republicans launched themselves in a state-of-the-art time machine today to complete an important mission: traveling to the future to disagree with President Barack Obama.

The self-styled "timestronauts," led by House Minority Leader John Boehner, traveled two days into the future to attend this Thursday's health care summit.

Returning safely to the present after their brief visit to the future, Rep. Boehner took issue with everything Mr. Obama will say on Thursday.

"My colleagues and I have traveled two days into the future and listened to everything the President will say," he told reporters at the Capitol. "And it all will suck."

Rep. Boehner said that the Republican time-travel machine was an unqualified success, and may have even broader applications going forward: "We hope someday to take this entire country back to the nineteenth century."

Minutes after Rep. Boehner's press conference, White House spokesperson Robert Gibbs blasted the GOP time-travel mission as "an insult to the spirit of bipartisanship and a gross misuse of time-travel technology."

Rep. Boehner offered this response: "Obviously, we already knew he was going to say that."

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Richard Kigel Staten Island, NY

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Comments (4)

Richard Kigel Wednesday, February 24th 2010 at 11:25AM

This shows how truly innovative and forward-thinking the Republican idea machine is.

ROBINSON IRMA Thursday, April 10th 2014 at 6:47PM

Rich, I had come to this blog originally to make this comment, but that segment on Sharpton and tavis came on the tv, and I are in a different rooms so I had to go watch this interview with Sharpton...it is so rare that I see him now that his is acting like a Black community leader and not just a media talking head...

And, being me and knowing what one is willing to do to try and bring equality tomy people as Oprah uses he money, fame and power to do and still is segrated from meida reporting her, ect. she is getting her own network so that she can better allow uncensored information on the Black local community..."I" am going to usse my time machine.loooool...

I predict that we will learn a lot if we watch you blogs on Olbermann and Maddow and this leads more of us to watch these two White people and follow their leads as we did Dr. King's because they are putting his words into actions in a brand new century later ...we will be one more step towards UNITY BOTH IN AND OUT SIDE OF THE BLACK COMMUNITY...

another of my predictions is that those like Tavis Smiley and Tyra Banks like Oprah are not going to renew their talk show contracts, because of Oprah's coming network..........O-W-N...those like so many of us refuse to allow even the media to be the sole educator our our BIA from slavery to now after e have a Black president and by way of our ties with the Mother Land being excluted....

like our president and Oprah was forced out of Trinity because the court of public opinion (Jim Crow)

so this makes Jim Crow a positive even though we refuse to accept calling racism any thing but Jim Crow...and Rich, the professor was saying the same thing I say about certan words we can not use the way we want to use it...but, I am not in any needs to be accepted by public opens at the cost of ratings getting our true community out in the national news...No, I am not saying that I do not agree with her 110% and am so proud of her for being able to do this...WE BOTH KNOW THAT SOME ONE LIKE ME IS NOT GOING TO BE INVITED BACK(smile)

and, because "I" know you have an open mind, "I" really did not ahve to say anything like that to you, Rich, but Educate!!!Educate!!!! Educate by any means necessary...

AGAIN MY ENDLES THANKS AND RESPECT FOR YOUR DOING THIS...YES WE CAN...YES WE MUsT...

Oh, at the end of this interview the viewers were advised to go to "THE GREIO.COM IF THEY WANTED TO SEE THIS IN ITS eNTIRITY.(smile)

ROBINSON IRMA Thursday, April 10th 2014 at 6:47PM

OK brother Richard, here is another job for you,PLEASE if you are reading this at this time go to MSNBC LIVE...and please, please, please turn this showing the segment of tavis Smiley and Al Sharpton as it is so vital to trying to EDUCATE US INTO PEACE ON EARTH GOOD WILL TOWARDS MAN...(smile)

ROBINSON IRMA Thursday, April 10th 2014 at 6:47PM

Rich, for me it is too bad that we still refuse to even not see that the last centruy was when Jim Crow ruled...Boy, what a job these people have done and is still doing to mankind from two wars to calling a depression a resession as long as they can keep so many in our local communitys (of all races and skin colors) stoping at pointing finges as this is all about a fight between these political partys...this is a fight to invalidate our Constitutiion and the welfare of this nation...

..WAKE UP..WE THE VOTERS ARE THE GOVERNMENT SO STOP POINT FINGERS AT THE VERY ONE ThaT ARE THERE ONLY BY OUR PERMISSION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!("I" am not smiling)

so sorry I keep leaving out the taxparers as paying " record " $trillions for this BEST CONGRESS THAT LOBBY MONEY BY BIG BUSINESS CAN AFFORD...and, our educational systems teaching us that this is democracy....

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